In disciple-making, you will inevitably find yourself trying to help someone discern God’s will. Should she take this job or stay where she is currently working. Should he move forward in this relationship and ask his girlfriend to marry him or let her go?
In many ways, life is an adventure that unfolds one decision at a time. So how do we discern God’s will in each decision? If you have grown up in church, you are probably familiar with external guidelines. ls it in line with God’s Word? Does it honor God? Is it a tangle way of loving my neighbor as myself? Although we should certainly use these guidelines, to be fair we have to recognize that there are a lot of things that qualify but may still not be God’s will.
And then we are encouraged to pray and directly ask God about it. So we ask simple “yes” or “no” questions, “Do you want me to take this job?” “Is it your will for me to marry my girlfriend?” Let’s be honest, however, when a decision is pretty emotionally charged we need more than a simple “yes” or “no.” We need self-discovery. We need God to reveal more of who He has created us to be in the process. So how do we get there?
Notice the tension in yourself. What parts of you desires this choice? What parts of you would rather turn it down?
Notice your fears. Is the part of you that wants to move forward motivated by faith and joy, or fear? Do you find yourself saying “yes” because you are afraid to say “no”? Do you not know how things will work out if you don’t take the job or move forward in the relationship?
Then view it from the opposite side. Is the part of you that wants to turn the opportunity down motivated by faith and joy, or fear? Even though “no” feels lifeless, to you want to say no because it feels safe?
Pray from that Place. The greatest commandment is love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Often it is only when we have taken time to notice the tension, feel our desires and fears, that we are ready to love God with our hearts and minds. And this is often when we are ready for Him to bring revelation.
Listen with a notebook. After you have poured out your heart to God, assume that He wants to speak. Treat Him like He is a loving Father who wants to answer you and write down what He says. Friend, what’s not written down or recorded will be forgotten.
Make a decision before you have to make a decision. After praying and hearing from the Lord, make a decision internally. Live with that decision for a few days. Thank God for His wisdom rather than constantly questioning the decision you made. After a few days consider the fruit.
The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness, goodness, and self-control. What has the fruit of your internal decision been? Has it born fruit consistent with the Spirit of God? Even in the face of your fears, does the decision breed peace and joy over where God is calling you?
Try using these steps in your own life and in the lives of those you help to disciple and you’ll not only discover God’s will, you will also more deeply discover your true self in the process.